2003-12-03 19:27:23 UTC
A public service educational skit featuring the esteemed Mr. Robert Ho
and his sidekick, ardeedee the First.
In this dramatic sketch, Mr. Robert Ho and ardeedee the First, through
example, exhibits to the rest of the ignorant world, the complex
thoughts, carefully-constructed logical underpinnings, and
bullet-proof system of reasoning (and reasons) why opposition
politicians are indisputably superior to the incumbent PAP leaders in
Mr. Robert Ho as "THE BRAIN"
ardeedee the First as "PINKY"
*ENTER THE BRAIN from stage-left*
[THE BRAIN steps up on to a dim stage. A stooping old man with
fraying, unkempt, radiating strands of gray hair, nevertheless, he
parades about with a sense of purpose. Swirling around in an old
justice's robes, evidently borrowed from his son's recent Halloween
party, his left hand holds open _The Communist Manifesto_, and his
right hand mechanically pops in colored pills from a bottle marked,
"Generic Lithium." Every now and then, while chewing on the pills, he
looks up from the book, and stares into the audience with a knowing
smirk. A dirty, mangled, copy of _The Unabomber's Manifesto_, lined
with aluminium foil, rests on his head, doubling as a hat.]
*ENTER PINKY from stage-right*
[PINKY enters the stage by terribly slow degrees. First, a bit of
orange-colored spikes can be seen appearing behind the curtains. It
bobs around in a frenzy for a bit. Then, the object resembling an
undersized orange-colored durian reveals itself as the head of PINKY.
This darts round for a little more, before the rest of the face
appears. A massively oversized pair of glasses balancing on an
impossibly small nose marks itself as the defining physiognomy of this
individual clad in what can be best described as a tie-dyed Tee-shirt
with a picture of foodstamps emblazoned front and back, with the
message, "Man does not live on bread alone. Gimme more!" A
bucktoothed, coffee-stained, sneer, which transmogrifies into an
infantile fawning gape when he turns his gaze from the audience, to
THE BRAIN, confirms that the latter is PINKY's sole reason for
existence, and object of affection.]
*THE BRAIN continues marching around the stage, with PINKY constantly
checking his master's clothes for bugs, fleas, and food stains. Every
now and then, with a drooling grin, PINKY adds another layer of
aluminium foil to THE BRAIN's "hat," before resuming snarling at the
audience and demanding more free benefits.*
[In a sudden about-turn, with a look of thunderstruck epiphany, THE
BRAIN turns to PINKY and exclaims.]
THE BRAIN: The winds of change blow, my friend... They blow, you
know... Waiting for who?
PINKY (excitedly leaping up and down): Someone with a kite? ..........
Robert H. Himmler